[Day 27/99]

Tonight I got to see a group of children perform a set of traditional Yukatán dances. It was pretty funny: you could pick out the kids who are trying *so* hard; those who are naturally graceful; and those who would just rather not be there at all.

It's so painfully human how we put a bunch of time, money, and effort into something, only to forget to enjoy the fruits of our labour. After weeks or months of preparation, we fail to be in the moment, and the moment passes us by.

It's like planning a trip to Paris, flying across the Atlantic, and visiting the Eiffel Tower -- but then leaving after a quick selfie rather then a having a picnic on the lawn. I mean, yeah, technically you went there, but did you experience it?

To be honest, I'm a little bit afraid of not experiencing life to the fullest. I like the concept of a bucket list, but besides being coined for a movie, it frames things in terms of death and (I think) leads to a mania of sorts. I also like the concept of s Sphere of Possibilities -- basically all the different futures I might have that stem from this moment right now. (BTW I highly recommend checking out the video "Imagining the Tenth Dimension") So what do you call the conscious act of navigating these possibilities? "Life Architecting" is close, but it's missing the connotation of actually living the life you've designed.

Because that's really the crux of it. You are the designer, the builder, and the occupant of your own life. The funny thing is that we need to practice all three skills which are very different from each other. Even the living part is difficult!

I started listening to the book "Clarity" and one of the first things he addresses is the fallacy of "if I only had this or I only did that THEN I would be happy." He argues that our well-being does not need to be dependent on our circumstances.

Alan Watts might say that the job of the guru is to show you how ridiculous of an idea it is to think that anyone else has a better idea or what's going on than you do.

Gary John Bishop might say to not focus on changing present self, but on becoming the future self you envision.

Only you know where you need to be.